Self vs. Whole

Performing good deeds is not just all by one self, all for one self
Do it together, you'll gather more strength, more resolute, for the whole entity
and we shall also reap its fruit, for we are part of the whole.

So lo togetherness, appreciate privacy
but give in not to individualism
for they are truly apart

If (Rudyard Kipling)

If

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;
(This is different subjectively, in that sometimes people are indeed granted wisdom by God and it becomes visible/apparent, truly not to those persons' mistake, but Rudyard Kipling was a Victorian english, so keep that in mind and deify him not)

If you can dream---and not make dreams your master;
If you can think---and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings---nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And---which is more---you'll be a Man, my son!

Rudyard Kipling

Patience

  In arabic, the language used by Islam, the word for patience is shabr (sha as in shaft and br as in saber, mintly read)

  But the word shabr impies more meaning, all interconected just by looking at them. We don't need to be a etymology professor to discern them. They are persistence, perseverance, self restraint.

  So, here's one story :

The Monk and the Samurai

Retold by John Porcino

There was once a samurai warrior who traveled to the distant home of an old monk. On arriving he burst through the door and bellowed, "Monk, tell me! What is the difference between heaven and hell?"
The monk sat still for a moment on the tatami-matted floor. Then he turned and looked up at the warrior. "You call yourself a samurai warrior," he smirked. "Why, look at you. You're nothing but a mere sliver of a man!"
"Whaaat!!" cried the samurai, as he reached for his sword.
"Oho!" said the monk. "I see you reach for your sword. I doubt you could cut off the head of a fly with that."
The samurai was so infuriated that he could not hold himself back. He pulled his sword from its sheath and lifted it above his head to strike off the head of the old monk. At this the monk looked up into his seething eyes and said, "That, my son, is the gate to hell." Realizing that the monk had risked his life to teach this lesson, the samurai slowly lowered his sword and put it back into the sheath. He bowed low to the monk in thanks for this teaching.
"My friend," said the monk, "That is the gate to heaven."

Reprinted with permission from Spinning Tales, Weaving Hope: Stories of Peace, Justice & the Environment, edited by Ed Brody, Jay Goldspinner, Katie Green, Rona Leventhal, and John Porcino, New Society Publishers, 1992. New edition 2002.

http://www.healingstory.org/stories/peace-stories.html

Here's another story :

Once in Arabia perhaps (i recall my memory of the story here), lived a couple, a husband and a wife (not adulterous couple as accepted in crazy countries nowadays). One day, the husband got an isnpiration to engrave his sword, as customary in all over the world untill today, to put inscription(s) on one's bladed weapon. His choice of writings was "shabr".

So, one day, out of necessity, he had to leave his wife and infant boy to do something important abroad, and maybe for a long time. Indeed it took long time in the end. Years of it.

Upon returning home, while overawed by joy, he rushed to their tenthouse. Only to catch sight of a handsome, fine, yet un-known young man coming out of it. Angry at first sight, he immediately drew his sword, and quicly catch the sight of the engraving he himself had chosen to put many years earlier. The insciption "shabr".

So, he entered the tent first, having withdrew his sword and hold his temper, to find his overjoyed wife. He then asked her kindly, "who was that very fine young man coming out of our tent just earlier?"

She so proudly replied "honey, that man was our grown up son": )

May we all derive good lessons from those simple stories. The simple ones are sometimes the best in dealing with this complex life.

http://m-alwi.com/makna-hidup-dalam-kehidupan-berkeluarga.html

Makna Hidup Dalam Kehidupan Berkeluarga 

6 Apr. 2012 Alwi 

  Makna Hidup Dalam Kehidupan Berkeluarga. Manusia adalah makhluk psikologis yang menganut suatu makna. Dalam psikologi komunikasi ada ungkapan “world don’t mean, people mean”; kata-kata itu tak memiliki makna, manusialah yang memberikakan makna. Manusia adalah makhluk yang mampu memberikan makna terhadap obyek. Obyek yang sama mungkin diberi makna berbeda-beda oleh orang yang berbeda. senyum biasanya dimaknai sebagai keramahan tetapi bagi orang yang sedang sakit hati kepada seseorang, maka senyuman orang itu bisa dimaknai sebagai penghinaan atau ledekan. Senyuman ibu tiri sering dimaknai buruk oleh anak tirinya, berbeda dengan persepsi dengan anak kandungnya. Senyuman yang sama berdampak menyejukkan bagi seseorang dan mungkin berdampak menyakitkan bagi orang lain.

  Apa makna sesuatu bergantung kepada persepsi tentang fungsi dari sesuatu itu, mata dipandang bermakna jika berfungsi untuk melihat, telinga dipandang bermakna jika berfungsi untuk mendengar, mobil dipandang bermakna jika berfungsi sebagai kendaraan. Suami dipandang bermakna oleh istrinya jika berfungsi sebagai suami, presiden dipandang bermakna oleh rakyatnya jika berfungsi sebagai pemimpin. Begitulah seterusnya segala sesuatu, tingkat bermaknanya bergantung kepada tingkat fungsinya.

Makna Hidup
   Manusia hidup di muka bumi memiliki berbagai fungsi, bagi dirinya, bagi keluarganya, bagi masyarakatnya, bagi bangsanya, bagi dunia dan bagi alam sekitarnya. Ada orang yang merasa dirinya bermakna tetapi tidak dipandang bermakna oleh orang lain, sebaliknya ada orang yang merasa dirinya bukan apa-apa dan bukan siapa-siapa, tetapi orang lain sangat menghormatinya.

  Ada orang yang tinggal berada dalam suatu lingkungan dalam waktu yang lama, tetapi kehadirannya tidak berpengaruh apa-apa bagi lingkungan masyarakatnya, maka ia tidak dipandang bermakna, hadirnya tidak membuat genap, dan absennya tidak membuat ganjil. Sebaliknya ada orang yang hanya melintas sebentar dalam kehidupan masyarakat, tetapi karena kehadirannya membawa perubahan besar kepada tatanan masyarakat maka sepeninggal orang tersebut namanya masih selalu disebut, gagasannya masih selalu didiskusikan, pendapatnya masih selalu dirujuk orang. Waktu yang sebentar tetapi fungsional dalam membawa perubahan, maka kehadiran sebentar itu dipandang sangat bermakna, sehingga mungkin nama orang itu diabadikan dalam nama jalan atau gedung, atau bahkan banyak bayi lahir yang kemudian diberi nama dengan nama orang itu.

Kunci Hidup Bermakna
   Hidup menjadi bermakna sangat erat hubungannya dengan pandangan hidup yang dianut. Jika seseorang memiliki pandangan hidup (way of life) yang benar, maka peluang untuk membuat makna dalam hidupnya sangat terbuka. Sebaliknya pandangan hidup yang keliru akan membuat keliru juga dalam mengambil keputusan yang akan berakhir bukan saja hidupnya menjadi kurang atau bahkan tidak bermakna, tetapi ada kemungkinan justeru merusak, merusak dirinya dan merusak orang lain. Pandangan hidup dipandu oleh konsep budaya dan oleh keyakinan agama. Budaya yang tinggi akan melahirkan makna penting dan besar, budaya yang rendah akan melahirkan makna yang rendah pula. Keyakinan agama yang lurus akan melahirkan kehidupan yang benar-benar bermakna, sementara akidah agama yang keliru atau sesat akan menyesatkan penganutnya pula dan berujung pada kehadiran yang tak bermakna atau bahkan merusak.

Sumber : Buku Psikologi Keluarga – Dari Keluarga Sakinah Hingga Keluarga Bangsa -
Prof. DR. Achmad Mubarok, MA, hal. 154 – 156. Buku ini kebetulan saya (penulis asli) peroleh secara langsung dari penulisnya (hadiah).

 

The Flight Of The Bee

  Do you wish to see me wrote "The Flight Of The Bumblebee":)? I'm truly sorry. I admit i did gain my inspiration from that classical piece of Nikolai Rimsky, its title of course, which also one of my favourite classical piece, but noo..this won't be about that song.

  Ok, here's a picture of Bee

  Here's another one

  Fine, to get moving forward, i just would like to say that there's is actually a surah entitled "The Bee" in the Qur'an. Funnily, the animal mentioned the most inside it is the cow! But God does speak about bee somewhere else. God mentions in the qur'an that "He disdains not to use the similitude of a gnat" (larvae of mosquitoes etc) to teach us (the Qur'an 2nd surah verse 26).

  Let's take a look at bees. Deep look, not just western, hellenisteic inspired superficial physycal sensual look. But REAL DEEP look.

1. Bees only come to good quality plants with good quality flowers. Then they just take what they need, which is good quality pollen.
2. They just take what they need, leaving everything else intact. Even help inter-plants pollination/seeding.
3. They work together with all their very body and souls, just for the welfare of the whole colony.
4. They don't disturb anybody deliberately. But if their home and family get harassed, they will give their bodies and souls to destroy the attacker.

  Why won't we be like them?
  I don't say "why can't we be like them" because God permit we CAN. The question left is our willingness.

1. We come just to good places, good neighbourhood, good surroundings, doing good things only.
2. Doing good things only includes leaving all we don't need intact, even better if we can bring improvement (aren't bees actually hellp plants pollinating/seeding each other?)
3. We are all individuals, but the fact, out of all selfishly made presumption, human ones, is that we all come from One Source and will go home to One Destination. We are part of the same universe and we need each other and slowly or quickly, directly or not, all our actions influence each other. So we all better work together towards one universal, all encompassing mutual benefit and goodness.
4. Not deliberately disturbing anybody who has not done anything wrong to us. But when our family, community, home, belief, is harassed, we are prepared to die for their salvation.